Retreat

  For a while now, I’ve been feeling a call to explore.

Explore the other ways of making art other than the canvas.

This is mainly a response to all those who have shown a great interest in my wood carvings, honestly I’ve been enjoying it too, but it has opened up a world of traditional crafts that I just need time to looking into and perfect. Gilding, Carving, Casting, all are making me retreat into myself.

  I call this a retreat not in terms that I’m running away, but in regrouping. Regrouping my resources and solidifying them for future use.

  Partially its a retreat from the art world, a world I both love and feel extremely alienated by(1).

  It’s also a retreat from the expectation that I have to be constantly on show. That my work and my presence need to be everywhere or people will forget I exist (2).

  I have to be happy merely existing, doing things that fulfil me rather than forcing people to acknowledge me. I want to make things that I’m happy to call mine rather than the sake of creating. Art is more than just galleries and champagne. Its history and beauty, with a lot of the time a combination of the two. I can’t see myself going for opportunities and networking at the moment(3).

  Rather than being an existential ‘am i a real artist if I’m not exhibiting?’, the main reason for stepping back a little is down to my interests expanding. I’m looking at what I can get from the world skill and knowledge-wise. I want to grow as an artist, not being known for one thing(4). I need to see where I can push myself in my practice, not limiting myself in paint which I have been doing for over 5 years.

  In the coming months, maybe even years, I’m going to be taking time to learning languages(5), crafts, theory and history that I can build upon. Basically I want art to be enmeshed with the world that we inhabit. We can’t forget that we are all here because of the actions of others that we choose to reject or accept. I want my art to be a continuation of those craftsman that came before us, often forgotten over time. I’m a member of the heritage crafts charity that keeps a record of the many heritage crafts that are dying out or are extinct. I feel that there is a lot to gain from exploring this.

  Going further, I’m trying to be the Uber-Brit(6). A person know knows more about the world I inhabit and call home. A place of change and tradition, folklore and myth. If what I gain from this somehow helps future generations explore history and possibilities, then I can die a happy man.

1. It’s strange, the art world is full of people meeting new people and learning from each other. On the other hand, it’s a full of people just networking. If you have nothing of value to these people, they won’t take the time to know you.

2. The truth is much harder to accept, that most don’t care. You can be part of shows and the person you were next too barely remembers you.

3. Maybe I’m just a little jaded.

4. Unlike that Jeff Koons, terrible artist. Or Kaws.

5. With a general understanding in French, Italian and Welsh (though not fluent), I want to start learning Irish, Scots Gaelic and Cornish. Britain is more diverse than you think, and that’s not taking into account the accents that are equally part of this land.

6. /North Insular European. VERY important when I'm including Irish as a lingustic interest. But in saying so, we know a lot of what was lost in Ireland due to colonialism, but we do forget the losses in Britain. Though not same, many identities in the North/not London area have been decimated due to enclosure and poor land management from landlords prioritising profit over people.

   
   
   
   

The one piece of art I can never do

Over this year, a lot of things have changed. I've started a new job(1), I've got engaged to the best person in the world, and the overwhelming feeling of not doing enough creatively is slowly dissipating(2).

But as I keep making things, there is this one I've strived to make that I hate doing. It plays in my mind and I have dreams of showing off an entire exhibition of them, but that requires an ungodly amount of effort that I just don't possess.

This one thing is a Carpet page.

For those who don't know what carpet pages are, they are large compositions that fill an entire page with decoration and forms. The famous ones are in the Books of Kells and Lindisfarne(3) and are opposite the saints pages that form the four books in the tomes. There are a marvel to see, to examine and replicate. If you don't know them, please give them a google, they are a great evidence of Hiberno-Saxon/Insular art that is also inspired by the mediterranean.

One thing that in required by the those who made these marvels is this ability to spend hours and hours just following patterns and repeating motifs over and over again. There is this meditative element in them where you just have to stay in the process to finish it, something that the monks and religious craftsman would have in the boatloads. Meditating on the love of god with every scratch of the stylus and application of ink. If you had that mindset and separation of the task and ego you could go from morning to night just glorifying your beleif into the parchment.

The thing is, for me, is that I'm more practical. I like to see what is happening and getting it done in a day. For this reason, intricate details that I want to include just claw at my brain and I have to leave it unfinished. I do think there is a perfectionist aspect to my thoughts, as any mistake makes the drawing a throw away instantly(4). I know I'm a perfectionist, but the beauty of mitsakes or happy accidents that I love in people like the abstract expressionists are just not present in these pieces.

In my painting, I love the brushstrokes and the physicality of the paint that isn't in the precise nature of a carpet page. So how do I gel these facts together?

I don't know.

The only real answer is to keep going but with styles that do interest me, like the abstract forms and visual riddles that are a massive part of British art, even up to today. Spirals and light are going to be more prevalent in my work, all my sketches are pointing me in that direction. I've been doing this long enough to notice that where your interest points you should follow it rather than lock into one thing. That's why I can't be a monk, I'm too much of a wanderer. I like the freedom, the ability to go places(5).

If I do make a carpet page in the future, I don't think it will be the same as the Books mentioned. I will be putting my own twist on it, and I will be honouring the ever shifting and changing land that we call home.

(1) so much better than the last one, I'm actually engageing with people!

(2) mainly because everything is very expensive. I have a new job but it's still tight.

(3) These are two different books.

(4) The monks would also agree, with perfection being the best way to show devotion. "good enough does not exist in the Celtic Church, nor the later Catholic church in the renaissance.

(5) And if you do too, support the Right to Roam (R2R)

The oldest house in Britain.

  I enjoy history.

  This isn’t a new fact; I’ve been very open about this. It’s a massive part of my artistic and creative pursuits. With this I’m drawn towards media that explores the new findings rather than just throwing out what everyone already knows(1).

  So, when I watched ‘Digging for Britain’ this year, I was delighted to see that a lot of finds and excavations were situated in the iron age and earlier. Graves, settlements, and offerings seemed to show up all over the place.

  But there was one site that piqued my interest, and that was a Bronze age hut found on a Cardiff rugby pitch(2).

  In the excavation, archaeologists found evidence of people living, working, and repurposing the site. It was likely a place of high prestige, as the axe heads were unusual and not wholly utilitarian and therefore used as a status symbol. Another thing they found was the post holes had been used more than once. While this could be put down to rotting wood replacement, they also pointed to another explanation. That this hut was disposed of and rebuilt to separate the previous occupier from the new one.

  This is fascinating because it implies that it was dismantled, similar in belief as that of the Apache, where things are destroyed after a death. It’s a moment that moves the social order onwards and clears the area for future use. Though they did not do it for similar reasons(3), the parallels are interesting. There is a systematic destruction of the past in these acts, but with a decorum that could be seen through our alien eyes as disrespect. Neither of these groups destroyed these artifacts out of malice, but more likely fear(4) or honour.

  If we did explore these, I think we have to imagine what our relationship with these things would be. What is the symbolism that this destruction gives? Why must the items cease to be used in such a final way? Do we create the same things again, or create something different?

  Let’s think like a group. Your leading family(5) has died off. The patriarch or matriarch was a leader with certain ideals that were necessary for your collective survival. Now the next in line needs is taking control. How do you symbolise this transference?

  If we were to look at most European monarchies, there are items that are preserved and carry a special resonance. The sceptre, the crown, the orb(6). But that doesn’t seem to be the case with the hut.

  If we look at the Apache for another way of explanation, we can see that their destruction is highly individual. The possessions of the deceased are destroyed and not carried on, as the dead person’s things are not theirs to keep but to give to the spirit as appeasement. If we used this frame to explore the hut, could we see a similar attitude?

  The hut, what’s left of it anyway, did seem to be a high-status area. It was reused, which indicates that the location was important, but the structure was not. So if we were to use our big, creative brains that are able to come up with other ways of existing, what can we come up with?(7).

  This is mine.

  The VIDP(8) has passed. Their accomplishments and accolades are remembered at the ‘wake’ and the next in line takes over. But to both honour the dead and challenge the newcomer, the hut is not reused. It is ceremoniously taken apart and destroyed. The belongings are given back to the land(9) or melted down to be fashioned into other things. A new dwelling is erected on the same spot as it is a sacred space, but the slate otherwise has been wiped clean. Now the new leader must act as they see fit, separated from the actions of the ancestor. New treasures have to be commissioned and spread about. This gives those in charge a motivation to both make a name for themselves and create new prosperity for their people. Allowing for new styles of art and expression to arrive in the area, founding a new fecundity of culture that binds up the people.

  This stops as either the traditions a no longer observed(10) after a few generations or outside forces means the area has to be abandoned(11).

  This is all writing a nice lore for a place that we know little of the people. But it limits us to understanding the past through a similar lens that we see our world through, you are equally making up history as I just did. We are not the people of the past, and they are not us, each is equally valid. But we can’t allow our biases cloud the actual facts of their lives.      

  History is more complex than that.

1.     ‘Knows’ is a problem for me because we don’t actually know much about anything. People say they know that we progressed from stone to bronze but forget that it took a while because people throughout all of history are fickle and would rather stick with what they know.

2.     I think it was more an open field that had a rugby pitch on it, but my point still stands.

3.     The Bronze age hut was 4000 years ago whilst the North Americans are more contemporary.

4.     The Apache, from the website called www.alivehospice.org they were/are fearful of the dead, as they resent the living. My original group was another tribe, but I can’t remember where it was in ‘the origins of everything’ by David Graeber and David Wengrow. I might revisit them in the future because indigenous ways of living are just amazing.

5.     Let’s just assume that we are in a hierarchical system for this one time.

6.     Mainly the British crown here, sorry about that.

7.     This is not inherently archaeology, but it’s important for us to come up with these answers. To reject the myth of progression is difficult, but once you do you notice the infinite possibilities that are available to us for future society.

8.     Very Important Dead Person.

9.     Hoards are found like these, where artifacts are placed in the earth. Think like a ‘return to the earth whence you came’.

10.  We see this all over the place. The old is dropped as something else is prioritised. Sometimes down ton conflict.

11.  England has SO many abandoned towns and villages due to enclosure and industrialisation. If we learnt about these lost landmarks, I think we would be very annoyed, but it’s not in the ruling class’s interest to teach these histories. You literally have to go out looking for them.